Birthday Party

What if no one came?

I had to entertain the very real possibility that they might not come.

The cupcakes were ready, games organized, decorations (mostly) in place, and three really excited kids were bouncing off the walls.  We were having a small birthday party for Isaaq and had invited some of the neighbor kids. No big deal right?

Well.....Birthday parties are not common culturally here, most people don't even know when their birthday is. So maybe, they just wouldn't think it was a big deal and wouldn't come. I thought about this. I also thought about how important it was for me, to have others celebrate the life of this beautiful little boy God has given to us. I'd hoped they would come. The thing is (full disclosure here) ... I guess you could say we're the 'different' family on the block. The blue crayon in a box of all red. You say "pop" when everyone else says "Coke."  The lone Cyclone fan in Iowa City. You get the idea.

And...There's consequences of being different. Some good, some bad.

I remember somewhere in the fog of elementary school going to a birthday party in a nearby town with my sister Erica. I can't even remember the girl's name anymore, Anna maybe? She was a student in my mom's class and we'd been invited to her birthday party. I remember riding in our van and my mom telling us something to the extent of "If you're the only ones at the party, don't ask where everyone else is or who else is coming. Just have a good time celebrating her special day." Sometimes it amazes me what mom's have to tell their kids. Anyways. We arrived at the party and sure enough, we were the only ones there. She had invited all the other girls in her class at school. None of them came. Money makes us different people, sometimes in good ways, others not. Her family was very poor. I remember being amazed at the condition her family lived in. Drawers missing from the kitchen, furniture missing from everywhere, the things of everything that fills the houses of most, missing. I remember walking across the floor of her upstairs bedroom and thinking that the floor might fall in. What was so strange was that there were tons of decorations, and a very ornate cake, lots of other goodies- a stark contrast to everything else we were seeing. It was clear that this party was very important to her family. I was so glad we'd come. Heartbreaking to consider anyone having a birthday party and then having no one attend to celebrate your life.
So this is what I had in my mind. It's hard being the 'different', but honestly, it would be far worse to be the same here.  The 'same' isn't always better, in fact, sometimes, much worse. The deep lines of mistrust saturate the ground here, even dividing families, sisters, brothers, spouses. We may live next door to each other and share so much of life, but we're still worlds apart.

We told Isaaq, they might not come. They might have other things going on, that we'd just have to wait and see. And so we waited... fixed decorations... and waited... fixed more decorations...and waited... and got the babies fists tight out of the cake... and...
we heard  faint knock at our front gate. They came! All dressed up for the party. The kids were thrilled and even more nuts than they'd been for the previous 3 days leading up to the party. I was so glad.
And the party was great. Our guests were so excited they couldn't eat their cupcakes and had to take them home with them. We played "Pin the tail on Lightening McQueen" (it was a Cars themed party), had a 'Spare tire' treasure hunt, and played some other fun games. Isaaq even received a large box of candy bars and a big bag of candy.
The  next day, I talked to the mom of our guests, she was beaming and thanked us profusely for inviting her kids. She said they had the most wonderful time and had never been to a birthday party before. Score for being different.





And somebody got a new bike.

Happy birthday to my handsome little hero.