Three year olds make you think about these things... I just finished the book Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. It's based on the Good Book, providing insights on childrearing, discipline, and obedience. I really enjoyed it for many reasons and while I do think it is a good book, I don't think it is the 'end all' of all books on parenting. Anyways.
I was reading the chapter on submission to parental authorities. And this quote got me thinking: "If you rouse your children and announce that you are taking them to an amusement park for the day, you would not regard their cooperation as submission. They are doing what they want." (pp134)
Whoa, now that got me thinking about what of course? Marriage. Yep, my marriage to handsome hubby. I totally, never ever thought about submission in that way. I remember before I got married and I thought submission was such a beautiful thing (true) and I thought that it would be easy (not true) because I was marrying a wonderful man (true) who loves the Father with all his heart (also true). But as I quickly learned through that first year and onward, my husband is not perfect, and neither am I. Sometimes he has to make some very difficult decisions for our family. I may not always agree with his decisions. I may be passionately against a decision that he wants to make (though thankfully this is rarely rarely true), and yet I'm called to submit (disclaimer: obviously if the decision is sinful, she shouldn't submit). And submission sometimes, ladies and gentlemen, is H-A-R-D. Usually for myself, I don't want to submit because I'm being stubborn and selfish and wanting MY way (my three year old and I have this in common). I've learned over these years that my husband is a very good decision maker. I am blessed. Submission is not agreeing to go to a spend a weekend at a bed and breakfast with just the two of us. What??????? That's doing what I want.
Submission is (not grudgingly) agreeing to watch the kids so he can spend some time with some friends, even though I might have had other really good plans (like watching Top Chef). I'm blessed to have a husband who thoughtfully listens and considers my ideas way more than he ever should (and if you know me, you'd probably agree:) And I hate to say it, but he's usually right (though don't tell him this, if you do, I'll vehemently deny it).
There are times that I whip out stubborn Mull-Dawg (my personal nickname for myself) and I refuse to submit, thinking my way is best and that he (of course) doesn't understand the situation to the extent that I do. Then I become Mrs. Defiant Mull-Dawg. This is sinful. Sometimes, I really am right but I realize in these times that often in my thoughts and my attitude, I find pride and bitterness festering with a splash of "I told you so!" It can't be easy being married to Mrs. Always Right. Not good fellow chickens. Not good. This attitude hurts him, but hurts me and sometimes others around me.
Culturally, we're not so good at submission are we? Perhaps our strong senese of individualism contributes to that? I don't know. We have a strong understanding of the "I" and "I want." At least I do. Maybe I'm the only one. But it's not always the best for "us." We're all connected. We're all under submission to some authority both earthly and eternal. Whether we like it or not And just for the record, I usually don't like it, but I think that's probably sinful, so don't be like me.