So here I sit in South Korea. Its 4:34 in the morning on the last day of June, 2007. My wife is asleep in bed and it seems right to see her sleeping under the white sheets and with the fan on in this Korean summer heat.

Already our year in Korea is almost over. It’s a little overwhelming to think about the future… as all the things I know I should be doing and planning for run endlessly through my head.

Life is so strange. Continually I think we are called to wonder about the purpose for which we breathe each breath we breathe. I mean, our specific purpose. What is today all about… what is it really for?

And so here I sit in South Korea… at 4:43 in the morning. Its still the last day of June.

After today we will be leaving “not next month but the following month.” What tricks time plays on us… no wonder it doesn’t seem we were made to live within it. Indeed, we were not. I wonder, what is my breath for these next three months, these last ones in South Korea?

And then we will be gone. And South Korea will seem like all the dreams of the past. And all the dreams of the future will be present… and then soon also passed. [Will we dream of coming back?]

But what are those dreams of the future. Should they be a certain something? Then which something should they be? And the ones within our hearts… are they the ones that should or shouldn’t be? If God could dream what dreams would he already know and see for me? Does He see the dreams I dream as reality? And can I even pick the ones that shouldn’t be?

He’s given me free choice. But I want to do what He sees (or dreams?) for me.

And so I dream of many things. I dream to make use of each breath I breathe. That my dream could be His dream for me… or should I say that His dream could be my dream for He? And that His breath would be my breath in me!

And who am I called to breathe for? …to dream for? So many suffocating… dying for the Breath of life! …to breathe of Thee! How does one choose who to expend each breath for… Lord, show me. How can I choose? …should they not all breathe of Thee? Or at least know the breath you offer them when you breathed your last. To hear the story: from breath of virgin birth to breath which uttered “it is finished” on the tree. That breath of eternity…

Might they gulp down this breath and praise your name! Let all the nations be glad and rejoice in you Lord. Thank you for giving your breath for me! Let everything that has breath praise the Lord!
This is to breath.

I don’t understand life so I’m just going to focus on this breath and praise the Lord.

Its 5:20 AM. I’m still in South Korea. The sun is coming up. Another day’s begun.

I’m going to go lay next to my wife.